We Must Trust Changing Ourselves

Often we decide that we can delay necessary changes in ourselves because we feel we are surrounded by people who will not appreciate the change because they don't appreciate us now.  Or we decide that even if we change, the faults of those close to us will make the change of no effect.

 

Nothing could be more untrue.  The only change of any lasting value that we can make is in ourselves.  We can inspire change in others, but typically that comes when they see us eradicate the junk from our own lives and begin to blossom.  Very often in fact, the only way we will see change in those close to us, is if we ignore their faults and work only on ourselves, with the intent of changing only ourselves.  This cannot be something we begin with the end in mind of changing others, but we can know as surely as the sun will rise, if they have it in them, they will be inspired by the change they see in us.

 

I say, if they have it in them, because some people are very set in their ways, and when accompanied by laziness, the desire to change may lie dormant in them until their dying day.

So, to change ourselves, as we shall see, is no simple prospect, however once engaged, the process of self-change can make it even easier to see why we should limit this process to ourselves, because even when we have clear and impressive motivation to do so, change can take a long time, and focused effort.

 

Sometimes, if we change ourselves, our attitude, we will be the only one that changes, but sometimes, that change is necessary to be able to manage otherwise unmanageable relationships.  As we learn to tolerate or even to find the good in all things, a principle of nature kicks in, called the Heisenberg principle.  This was formulated as a Quantum principle, but much of Quantum physics begins to be applied to our world as we learn just how much of our world is defined by our own mind.

 

Stated most clearly by Wayne Dyer in his Power of Intention presentation, "When we change the way we look at things, the things we look at change."

 

More on this later 

Praxis should be the goal of everyone, but what is it?

The easiest way I know to exemplify Praxis, is to use the Belief Window example of Hyrum Smith, of Franklin/Covey. He described a process that is roughly the cycle of comparing results of our actions to the beliefs that spawned those actions, or in many cases, actions that were more impulsive, and were not necessarily based on what we believe at all.

If we look at results in a probative or questioning fashion, and ask ourselves, if we are happy or not with the results, especially if the action is one that is repeated often, we may be able to isolate those actions which are in opposition to our beliefs. But that is only the first and really the easy part of the proposition.

We often engage in regular activity out of habit, and often the action is so automatic that we do not recognize it as distinct or changeable. We may even consider the habit as part of our nature, making it almost impossible to visualize ever "not doing" or changing that action or activity.

Praxis then, is the act, whether over time or in short order, of bringing our actions in complete synchronization with our beliefs, and in correcting those beliefs which produce results which are neither desirable, nor in conjunction with our core beliefs.

The blog entries that will follow are intended to rouse a serious discussion of how exactly one may go about the process of praxis, and always within oneself, and never part of a program of changing another person. The beauty of praxis, is that once we reach an advanced stage of effectiveness, we may find that many of the dysfunctional relationships we have fostered along the way will heal themselves, which is often what happens, but only when we begin with ourselves.