How is Your Worldview Handling Things?

Some people literally move through life as a sailboat with nobody manning the sails and no rudder to steer. They are blown about by circumstances, tossed about by changing currents, and ever hopeful to reach the shore, without the slightest idea where that may be, if they ever get there.

I am happy to say that my life follows a constant direction, with a strong faith in the one who has supplied me with both the information regarding my current direction, as well as a way of constantly correcting my course. My destination is known to me, and I have been given rich descriptions of it, so that I may recognize when I have arrived.

I don't have all the answers to life's little challenges, but I have found that with my world view, even the hard times have purpose and lessons for me, and I take from them what I can, using a standard that has been laid down by countless travelers before me on the well trodden path I travel.

A brief outpouring of my joy online was met with a disappointing call to reality when a friend related that they have little for which they are feeling grateful, as I then came to discover they were referring to the death of their son-in-law who left behind a wife and six children and no insurance policy. I found out after some probing that it was a suicide, with apparently no note, which left even more of a mystery.

As I pondered what else could be said of any comfort, I was led to write this blog entry, to explore the subject of how do we find gratitude in such tragedy. I hope this is not taken lightly, as it is not created thus.

My first thought of gratitude was that in this case, unlike so many we hear of, the wife and children were not harmed by the suicidal husband/father. While no note can seem to be a bad thing, its absence can relieve the remaining family members from a declaration of fault that could bind them for the remainder of their lives to carry the chain of guilt forged by someone as their last act of weakness in this life.

Gratitude is a choice, just as grief, anger and wonder are choices. I just happen to believe that gratitude makes for a better lense through which we may see the choices that lie ahead, and thus through which we may find solutions to needs of the present moment. One might for instance simply be grateful that in this moment, I have the choice to move forward, and improve my existence. Yes, the choices may be hard, but to approach a solution, we must lift our thinking above the level we were at when the problems were created.

It helps if we have a worldview that tells us where we go when we leave this life. For most of us, it matters not whether it is ultimately the truth, as much as, does it allow us to picture some form of peace for the person at this point. That can certainly help.

For us to move on, it is certainly necessary to find others who love us enough to let us have some space, but also who are willing to help us move forward, and continue living. Absent enough sensible friends, one can let solitude get the best of them. Change is often hard enough as it hits us in daily routine, but this type of change can shift the very fabric of a life.

Having a worldview that teaches that we are here for but a moment of the eternity of our lives, to learn and to grow, and to return to our Heavenly Father gives me the strength to carry on in such a tragedy, I hope. I have not had to deal with death so close, or of such gravity, but each time a loved one deals with such a thing, it tests my worldview, and helps me to reinforce my beliefs as I share them in attempts to comfort those who are hurting.

My heart goes out to yet another family torn apart by the sudden and unexpected death of a loved one, even moreso because of the lives that will to some extent be forever changed by the not-knowing part of his departure. I am still searching for words, for now, these will have to do.